Wednesday, October 7, 2009


GOD I JUST FEEL LIKE SCREAMING!!!! im trapped im trapped and i need someone to release me. i really cant do this anymore sitting back in jealously. dude i dont even know what the hell im talking about. i just know that im so confused and the mind is a powerful thing. it will trick you if you let it and that what im doing. it's like someone is whispering terrible things to me. and i can't remove them from my shoulder. i try and try to ignore this person but again they just keep whispering. trying to convert me to believe them and trust them with my sanity. but if i do that then ill fall into the trap like last time. im not going back there. i cant do it i dont wanna hit rock bottom again. im in an amazing place in my life someone loves me and cares. they are there for me when they can be and i do the same for them. we communicate and dont keep secrets. its not perfect but i wouldn't trade our relationship for anything in the world. i really wouldn't i just want happiness for both parties and i hope that that means we get to stay together if not then yeah...lets change the subject. im getting lost in this blog writing something new every chance i get. i cant stop its like the second best release ive ever had. i cant help it.. getting these thoughts out stops them from running around in my head. i dont have to think as much i can just relax and try to catch those little seconds when i can have a conversation with my love. yeah i said it like that and i honestly dont give a flying fuck what anyone thinks. its me and him and that all that matters. peace

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