01/25/2010

that last post was an angry one, sorry about that even though no one reads this. i keep listening to these songs that make me wish i was in a relationship but then i think about it and if i cant be with the person i want i dont really want anyone. its not like im not open to relationships but the people i meet they dont get me and i dont think they want to. im a difficult person and i do apologize for that. ive been going through some hards times and i still am. i just need someone that understand what its like to be me and how much things affect me. ive been trying so hard to not let things get to me and its working. but sometimes it gets hard and im down for the count.. if you cant be the person to talk some sense into me then i dont think i can deal with you. i think ive just been spoiled by my friends (especially my best friend) but they actually get me at times and help me out. if only i could be with someone like them. for now im done with even thinking about dating because obviously no one wants me. which can bring my self esteem down. i think im the type of person that belongs in the friend stage. thats where im needed and can be useful. plus i think with that there will be stress and stuff and i need to get myself together before i deal with someone else. main thing is i..nvm i cant talk about that now